Here’s a list of horror movies I dredged from a horror listserve, supposedly all released in 2007. I’ve seen some of them; of course most of them I haven’t seen. I’ll bold the ones I saw, and put stars. Five stars is the highest rating.

The 13th Alley
1408 ****
28 Weeks Later ***
30 Days of Night **
666: The Beast
Abandoned, The (U.S. release)
Albert Fish: In Sin He Found Salvation
All Hallows Eve
All The Boys Love Mandy Lane
Am I Evil?
American Zombie
And The Woods Fell Silent Again
Antisocial Behavior
Asylum
Attack of the Baby Doll
Alien Vs. Preditor: Requiem
Babysitter Wanted
Banshee!! (yes, two “!”)
Barricade
Bats: Human Harvest
Belly of the Beast, The
Behind The Mask: The Rise of Leslie Vernon *
Beverly Hills Massacre
Black Christmans (remake)
Black Dalia Movie ***
Black Sheep (U.S. release)
Black Waters of Echo’s Pond, The
Blood & Chocolate
Blood Car
Bloodmonkey
Bone Eater
Boogeyman 2
Brutal
Brotherhood of Blood
Bug
Buried Alive
Butcher, The
Captivity
Carnivrous
Case 39
Catacombs
Chicago Massacre: Richard Speck
Chill
Closet Space
Clubbing To Death
Countess Bathoria’s Graveyard Picture Show
Creepshow 3
Cry, The
Cthulhu
Curse of LaLlorona
Curse of Smoke O’ Lantern
Curse of the Zodiac
Dark Floors
Dark Infestation
Darkness Surrounds Roberta
Darkness Waits
Day The Dead Weren’t Dead, The
Dead Man’s Hand
Dead Silence
Dead Tree Hotel
Dead Undead, The
Dead@17
Deadwood Park
Death of a Ghost Hunter
The Deaths of Ian Stone **
Deathtrap
Decadent Evil II
Decoys 2: Alien Seduction
Demonology of Desire, The
Devil’s Trade
Diary of the Dead
Disturbia **
Doctor Inferno
Dream Slashers
Driftwood
Drive Thru
The Dunwich Horror
Dying God
Eat The Parents
Ed Gein: The Butcher of Plainfield
Electrical Skeletal!
Etruscan Mask, The
The Evading
Exorcist Chronicles
Experiement 18: Das Hexenhammer-Projekt
Exquisite Corpse
Eyes of Samir, The
Familiar Spirits
Fear of Clowns 2
Fear of Lemonaid
Feast of Flesh, A
Ferryman, The ****
Fido
Fist of the Vampire
Flight of the Living Dead
Forest of the Dead
Frontiere
Frostbitten
Funny Games
Gallowwalker
Gay Bed and Breakfast of Terror
Gay Zombi
Gimme Skelter
Girl Next Door, The
God Thinks You’re A Loser
Gong Tau: An Oriental Black Magic
Goregoyles 2
Goth Girls: The Return
Grindehouse
Hack!
Hallowed Ground
Halloween (Rob Zombie’s) ***
Hannibal Rising **
Harvest Moon
Hatchet
Haunted World of El Superbeasto
Haunting of Sorority Row, The
Hell Awaits: A Portrait of Maddness
Hide and Seek
Hills Have Eyes II, The (remake)
Hitcher, The (remake)
Hogzilla
Hood Has Eyez, The
Horror Convention Massacre, The
Host, The (technically 2006) **
Hostile: Part II
I Am Legend ***
I Am Zombie Man
I Am Omega
In Search of Lovecraft
Inside
Irish Vampire Goes West, The
Isolation (in U.S.)
Joshua *****
Kaw
Killa Zombies
Killer Bikini Vampire Girls 3: A New Hope
Lake Dead
Last Zombie, The
Legend of Bloody Jack
Llorona Gone Wild
Long Pigs
Magus
May All Your Christmases be Black
Mega Snake
Messengers, The
Mist, The
Motocross Zombies From Hell
Mr. Halloween
Mulberry Street
Murder Party
Necroville
Netherbeast Incorporated
Nightmare Man
Not Quite Dead
Number 23, The *
Nympha
Orfanto, El (The Orphanage)
Ouija
P2 ***
Pan’s Labrynth (technically 2006) ****
Pirates of Ghost Island
Pop Skull
Postal
Poughkeepsie Tapes, The
Premonition, The
Primeval
Psycho Hillbilly Cabin Massacre!
Pumpkin Hell
Pumpkinhead: Blood Feud
Rage, The
Rapturious
Reaping, The
Resident Evil: Extinction
Return to House on Haunted Hill
Rise
Rise of the Ghosts
Rising Dead
Rock Zombie
Roman
Sam Hell
Satan’s Cannibal Holocaust
Savaged
Saw IV
School of Horror
Severance
Shadow Puppets of Doom
Shrieking Violet
Sick Bastard
Signal, The
Skinwalkers
So, You’ve Downloaded A Demon
Splatter Disco
Statement
Stir of Echoes: The Homecoming
Stitcher, The
Subject 8
Sublime
Succubus XXX
Supergater
Sweeney Todd
Sympathy
Teeth
They Wait
Thing in the Corner, The
Timber Falls
Torture Room
Trick ‘R Treat
Trigger Man
Tripper, The
Undead or Alive
Unearthed
Unholy, The
Vacancy ***
Vampire Biker Babes
Vampires of Zanzibar
Weenie Roast Massacre
Werewolf: The Devil’s Hound
White Noise 2: The Light
Wind Chill
Wraiths of Roanoke
Wrong Turn 2: Dead End
Yeti: The Curse of the Snow Demon
You’re So Dead
Zodiac *****
Zombie Cheerleader Camp
Zombie Farm
Zombie Hunter
Zombie Jesus!
Zombie Love
Zombie Stripper
Zombies Gone Wild
Zombies! Zombies! Zombies!

I suppose Toolbox Murders falls into that genre of “funny horror” which I don’t really understand. It’s either comedy or it’s horror- I don’t see them mixing very well. Ultimately the movie just doesn’t make much sense, as how could a guy live in an apartment building for decades and no one know he’s there? I mean, he does have to eat, doesn’t he? On the plus side, I’ve lived in some horrific apartment buildings, so I could relate to that aspect. The best argument for home ownership is that it’s better than renting! ** (Two stars)

Then there’s Neverwas, which has high ambitions but just doesn’t make the grade. It’s a bit too saccharine for me. What’s the matter with Dad anyway? Why is he so crazy? Where do they get the money to live in that mansion? There’s a lot of loose ends that just aren’t tied together. Like Toolbox Murders, there’s aspects that just don’t make any sense. How does the old King live out in the middle of the woods? Doesn’t he have to buy groceries? Does he walk to town? Questions like these bother me. OK I’m all for a little bit of suspension of disbelief but I can only take so much. *** (Three stars)

Carlito’s Way was a very cool movie. Realistic. I’m for realism in movies. I don’t know why, I just am. It seemed realistic. But why does the bad guy lawyer have to be Jewish? Don’t we Jews have enough problems already without being portrayed like this? Like Carlito, I’ve always wanted to escape to a tropical Paradise, but probably never will. **** (Four stars)

Rendition was just a little too pat and tidy for me, as I knew it would be going in. At least the evil government person was a lady, which gives equal rights a new twist. Is there anyone out there that thinks that the government doesn’t do nasty biz on our behalf? But since I’m from DC, anything that has this many shots of my hometown gets an added star just for that. There was an interesting article in the Washington Post this past weekend about Egypt- how poor it is over there. In Egypt, Upper Crust Gets the Bread: For Egypt’s more than 30 million poor, subsidized bread means survival. There’s poor teeming masses in Egypt, while we’re riding around in SUVs and watching American Idol. Why do we always back the wrong horse? What happens after Mubarak- who’s soon to celebrate his 80th birthday? It seems to me that Egypt, not Saudi Arabia, Iraq or Iran is the real lynch-pin in the Middle East, and it doesn’t look good. If you look at history, Islamic fundamentalism- the bad kind- started in Egypt and nothing has been done to ameliorate the conditions that spawned it. I don’t know what can be done, but things seem to be going from bad to worse.

1408 was real fright fest. For a movie about a guy stuck in a room, it was pretty scary. I like the line when the Samuel Jackson character says “It’s an Evil Fucking Room!”. I’ve had one of the most frightening experiences of my life in a New York City hotel room* not unlike the one portrayed in the movie, so I can relate. There is something fucking evil about some hotel rooms, especially the ones in New York City. You have to keep watching to find out if the guy makes it, but I won’t give it away and tell you if he does or not. However the ending is appropriate.

The beginning sort of pokes fun at the “horror industry” in an interesting way, too. Speaking about the horror industry, the big local horror convention Horrorfind Weekend is this weekend. They moved it from Baltimore to DC, though. If anyone wants to share gas, shoot me an e-mail at romarkin AT gmail DOT com. I’m going on Saturday. One day is enough for me, I don’t need a whole fucking weekend, thanks.

*And I’ve never talked about it with anyone. It’s my secret.

So far I’ve seen three movies named “Joshua”, which is a great name for a movie, for obvious reasons. Two of them were horror and one was sappy Christian. I couldn’t even sit through the sappy Christian one. The first horror was a low-budget flick by Fangoria, which I think is a horror magazine. It wasn’t very memorable, and I really don’t remember it. But this latest “Joshua” is good enough to earn such a good name. The kid named “Joshua” is very creepy. He gets away with murder, because who would suspect a little boy? Strangely I saw this just after another flick about a boy around the same age, “Birth“. “Birth” handled the reincarnation thing in a different way than “Audrey Rose”, and gives us a way to explain how the kid knows what he knows. But I’m getting off track here, aren’t I? This is supposed to be about “Joshua”! Anyway, Joshua was a good horror flick. No gore, but suspenseful and creepy. Worth seeing. The way the kid’s parents are portrayed is interesting, especially the clueless yuppie father. The yuppie father’s life is hell even before the kid starts acting out, but the kid is the final straw.